Today....Feb 6... 3 years ago today...
....just an extremely depressing feeling....
thinking back to that night and how it all began, I wish we could go back and make some different choices
I suppose there was a plan... which we can not understand... we just see things as they happen and hope to create our own understanding...
its extremely hard not to blame ourselves, especially when only a few seconds could have made a difference...
January 2005, I went back to Keesler for Radar Upgrade training... Jeremy was in the STARS class... first PT session, we formed a circle and started stretching.... right then and there we realized who we were. I knew Jeremy from initial training back in 2003...
so since then, we hung out, the 4 of us, pretty much everyday, lunch, dinner, weekends... we were a family away from home
Ryan...whose awesome Mom lived in New Orleans, we visited her every weekend. Friday night, we'd pack up and drive an hour an a half so go hang out at her house, she made us dinner, got some 7 & 7 and headed down to The Mardi Gras parades... lots of fun.... I can see Jeremy reaching for all the beads and handing them over to me.... (don't worry, it was a family environment, no flashing necessary), then after it was all over, he head back to the house just to sit and talk and laugh
I wish I could pull up all my pictures, but I just recently moved, and a lot of things are still in boxes.... I have a few... of when Jeremy and I went to visit Alejandra Galletti and Melissa Fernandez.... lol... and got lost in Georgia on the way back because we were too busy talking and laughing and failed to look for the I-10 signs..... yeah.... we were so far off, we ended up by Moody AFB.... yeah.... boonies
so..........
that night...
all that is ringing in my head is hearing Ryan and his Mom, Renee, "you don't want to go to Bourbon St" , "you don't want to go to Bourbon St, lets just go down to the pool hall like we did before" , "Bourbon street is too crazy, too many tourists, not cool" ...but no.... Me from California, Jeremy from Ohio, and Janina from Jersey.... "oh come on.... its Mardi Gras in New Orleans!! Come on, come on"
we were so determined on going....
so Ryan gave in and took us all to Bourbon st
we couldn't find a parking...
we ended up parking in some downtown apartment's tenant parking.... I had a bad feeling...but... we were sooo crazy about being in New Orleans for Mardi Gras... so we took it and ran down to the strip
it was a lot of fun... we went to a lot of different clubs.. had lots of Hand Grenades.... danced... laughed... drank.... got tired and decided to leave....
we're walking back, and Ryan's friend said "Hey, there's a tow truck over there" we couldn't even see our parking, but I just had a feeling and took off running....
SURE ENOUGH.... it was our car they were getting.... so I run over there... complain to the guys tying up the hitch "hey we're here, we can take the car out of the parking lot, yada yada yada" "No no no, ya'll gotta pay" I complain some more,
Jeremy gets there.... "how much?" he says... "$82" so Jeremy looks at me with his big eyes and says "i'll go get it at the ATM!!" I shake my head and keep trying to talk the guys out of it. Janina, Ryan, and Ryan's friend get there and ask what's going on... then... I hear tires screech. . .
the tow truck guys, who were facing that direction... told me someone got hit... right away I took off running, and as I was running I was praying to GOD it wasn't him... I pass the bushes, turn to the street and it was... it was his clothes... he was hit
the rest...
sigh...
...shaking my head...
...
...Jeremy wasn't in pain... I can say... that...
Meeting Jeremy changed my life entirely, he taught me many things...
he was so open hearted
he enjoyed everything in life...
welcomed everybody, I remember setting up our little area at the parades, with our cooler, chairs and umbrellas, and all of a sudden Jeremy was introducing us to people he just met, right there on the street,
he was so silly...I remember the Banana Pancakes he'd make at Renee's, how he had to coat the banana's with cinnamon before he put them on the pancake, and how he'd say "YeeeAAAHHH" at any random moment, I caught that in a picture, I have to pull it out.....
meeting him, definitely warmed my heart!!!!
I know he rests in Peace
there will be more to this page, but for tonight.....
Good night.....
I'm sorry Jeremy...
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